Before I started this course, I would never have said I was certain about something, however I would have said that there are truths that can be found from research. For example, in school you learn about Quantitative research more than Qualitative in subjects like maths and science so it is natural for us to believe we can find a truth from research. In school you undertake projects that compare hard evidence and data for analysis, maybe data that you have collected or maybe data that you have found, and then you make a conclusion that is believed to be a truth. This is how I assumed this course would be. However, since being involved in this course I have questioned my previous beliefs, knowing that conclusions we draw upon are no more than the researchers interpretations, especially in qualitative methods of research. Every result you receive from your research has depended on many factors that if changed, may have affected the result. The arts lends itself to the idea that everything affects another, including the researcher being an insider researcher. This was something I hadn't previously thought of but when I read about the theory of a non-positivist approach that things do not exist independently, I realised that everything has an effect on everything.
Do you feel that some of your beliefs have been derived from the practical application on your Professional Practice?
In a word - yes. I have based my inquiry around my experiences of auditions within this industry and how they can affect your mental health. Therefore, my beliefs about how we are affected by rejection, how we can deal with rejection and how we can move on from rejection are all based on my experiences of my Professional Practice. I am actually looking forward to completing the inquiry in Module Three to find out what others thing on this specific topic.
Do your beliefs conflict with general assumptions you make on a day-to-day superficial level?
I'm not 100% sure about the answer to this question. My assumptions about mental health within the arts due to rejection and amongst lots of other factors are things that I guess I don't think about superficially on a day-to-day basis (before this project of course), so I guess its tricky to really cross examine my thoughts on this. I wonder how everyone else feels about this question? If anyone has any ideas on how I can develop my thoughts on this please post them in the comments below!
Have you been influenced by dualist notions? What do you think of embodiment?
Previous to starting this course, without realising, I was a strong believer in the theory of embodiment that sees 'mind and body' as one thing and having an impact on each other. This theory is very relevant to my inquiry as it is based around mental health. I have always believed the mind and body are closely linked and believe if the mind is not healthy the body won't be either. This directly links to when you go to an audition as a dancer. Depending on your mental state that day, whether you've had a bad month, bad week, bad morning, or whether you just missed the train, all of those things can negatively affect what your body can produce that day. No matter how much you can pretend you are putting on a brave face and trying to be the best version of yourself you can be, if you're in a negative mental state you cannot be the best you can be. So I truly believe that the mind can affect the body more than we know.
Who in your inquiry can you elicit support from and what can you give back or share?
I hope I can rely on my Professional networks that I have nurtured over my career to help me during this inquiry. I will rely on them to take part in my research, but I would also like to research and meet new people, that I don't know as I may get different results from people I don't know and that aren't in my Professional Network as opposed to people who are. I will have an effect on the results as an insider researcher when I carry it out in module three and I need to be aware of this. On a personal level, I can use my friends, family and boyfriend as a support network for myself, especially as I am delving into a very sensitive subject for my inquiry.
Today's Note to self - Don't forget to REFLECT in everything you do... (e.g be aware of pre-conceptions you may already have in your inquiry topic etc)
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